Did TMNT kill the 3D Movie?

This weekend I finally jumped on the bandwagon and finally rejoined society in the movie going experience, full of overpriced popcorn and loud teenagers playing a mean game of wedgie. What exactly brought me out of my dweling hole to experience such excitement? The Turtles. That's right, me no longer the teenager or child I once was, well into the middle portion of my twenties, went to see a movie about four turtles who can kick some serious ass.

Unfortunately, the kid's reaction to his underpants being pulled was the highlight of my night as the new Turtles in 3D were bland, humorless, and even wimpy. Maybe there something wrong with me an avid UFC fan who now laughs when a Samuel L. Jackson says "there are snakes on this motherf*ckin' plane." Was it that I had become old, and Turtles were still young.

Impossible! Afterwards, too cure my hatred of all things youthful, I went back and watched one of my favorite films of all time, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1. There on my grainy VCR, I saw my childhood heroes become human again, filled with laughter, pain, and resolve that drew your in to their . They had real skin and real eyes that let you know that there was something more to them than their catch phrases and cool moves. They had heart.

But, that was 15 years ago, and today we get our first true evaluation of 3D medium compared to animatronics and live action effects. When the Toy Story first premiered we were able to approach CG movies from a blissfull new perspective that left us clamoring for more, so much so that an entire movie studio, Pixar, was able to thrive on making 3D movies alone. Pixar brought us to worlds that could not be seen with normal camera pans and zooms. So although we asked about the movie making process, we never explored the actual movie content.

Could Toy Story be a live action movie? Of course not, but shit hasn't anyone seen the Wizard of Oz. And is it fair to ask if the Incredibles, could have been just as entertaining as a live action movie?

Can't picture it, then take a look a the Batman series of the 60's, and soon you'll see that human actors could pull it off. Need further evidence then compare the "Prince of Egypt" to "The Ten Commandments" and many 3D movies just don't compare to their human counterpart.

The message to Hollywood here is simple: don't give up on people. We created the computers, and we can act better than them too. Here's a simple rule of thumb, if the setting is not in a far away place that I can see with my naked eye, then leave the CG alone, and a sewer with ooze doesn't count.